Recently, someone asked me if I love my obstetrician. Love is a strong word, and not one that I use lightly. I respect, adore, and trust my OB, but it is not a warm fuzzy love. Her energy is very masculine or ‘yang’ as they say in the Eastern traditions. She is an incredible scientist, and has a cool affect. It was important to me when I interviewed obstetricians that I have this sort of person in the room when I delivered my baby. I had a few risk factors associated with my pregnancy, and I was insistent on having the best prenatal care, to make sure that my baby was as safe as possible. While there are no guarantees with pregnancy, having a doctor that you can trust, and can speak your mind with is incredibly valuable.
On the other hand my Doula, was a long-time friend, and meditation partner. Lori Bregman, my Doula, is someone that I love completely and it is absolutely a warm, sweet feeling that I have for her. My Doula was able to hold sacred space in the room when my son arrived, as well as supporting me as a woman and a friend. Additionally she supported my husband and our vision as a couple when we welcomed this new life into the world.
In the East, there is a beautiful idea of the balance of masculine and feminine energy. As you most likely already know, a woman can have a very masculine or yang affect. Her energy can be clinical, cool, and driven by result. This was the case with my doctor, and I was incredibly grateful for her energy, as it balanced out the energy of the Divine feminine in the room. The Divine Feminine, was well represented, both by my husband’s tear filled eyes when he first laid eyes upon our son, and by my Doula who held the space of a healer. Viewing your birth team, whether it is an obstetrician, midwife, Doula, or even a family member that is like to be present in the room, think about the energy that you would like to have in that space. For me, it was incredibly important to have a balance of energies to create the feeling of sacred space.
Much love, Desi